Diamond cascade: Ah, so that’s why the wizard didn’t want to hang with us.

So this is it. The ending of an epic story, coming right up, in which the heroic Diamond Cascade and a bunch of supporting characters who, along with the truth of what actually happened along the way, have never been allowed to get in the way of a good story. Well, I say a good story, I mean a good for me story, as in one in which I, Diamond Cascade, get to look great and noble and heroic and also deadly, brooding and highly desirable to all passing fair ladies. We stand poised on the brink of a finale. The great and powerful artefact that will bring peace to the Karibia is within reach. All that stands in our way is a terrible and vengeful spirit from beyond the grave and his minions. Characters from my past have returned, friends and enemies both. Villains have been defeated, mighty victory or terrible defeat lie before us, and if we’re not ambushed by a last twist in the tale if and when we escape, I’ll eat my Story-Telling for Beginners manual.

And if there is a victory, the story will end something like this: And thus did Diamond Cascade free the Dragon-Orb from its prison and cast the evil dragon away into the void, never to return again, and the people of Karibia rejoiced and were free and lived happily ever after. And when we get to that bit in a few chapters time, consider these few things: Were the people really so free, ruled by one dragon instead of fought for by two? Was choosing the side with the most attractive secondary character really a valid way to decide the destiny of an entire continent? How long, exactly, is Diamond Cascade going to hang on to that all-powerful orb before sixty thousand million sword-swinging magic-blot-firing NPCs descend on him, some of them probably sponsored by the very dragon he catapulted to power. Is there such a thing as a good dragon? Can such a conflict evert truly be resolved? And, come to that, how exactly does ordering a ten-thousand year old dragon to piss off my island work? Will there really be no collateral damage?

Fortunately, I have a negative wisdom modifier. So mostly what I’m worrying about is how much money I can make selling tickets to the greatest show ever: Celebrity Dragon Deathmatch! In a Cage!


No tags for this post.

5 Responses to “Diamond cascade: Ah, so that’s why the wizard didn’t want to hang with us.”

  1. 'Judge Dredd ' says:

    I am getting a hackety cough lately and a real bad craving for bandages and ointments, does this mean I am getting mummy rot……

  2. Levinscious says:

    Don’t worry I’ll sneak attack you while you still have vital organs, or we can see if any of those ointments I have will help?

  3. 'Judge Dredd ' says:

    Oh no I think the mummy rot is getting worse…All I can think about now is going to a food supermarket.
    - because everybody knows mummies go to Iceland-

  4. Uthal says:

    and if you’re REALLY unlucky you’ll rot into Kerry Katona

  5. 'Judge Dredd ' says:

    A quick trip to the doctor “A very expensive High priest” and I am Ok now, lucky no important appendages fell off before the cure was administered – Lucky no one took the MUMMIES crown, I mean IT WILL KILL YOU because it is contaminated with the CURSE………It would have to be someone with a VERY, VERY low wisdom in fact they would be mentally outshone by Forest Gump on medication…..

Leave a Reply